What I’m Doing Here

August 25, 2010

So here I am – again, for anyone who has cared to stumble back onto this page; and, even for those who are themselves here for the first time, it’s obvious this is not my first time here.

I first began this blog way long ago (October 2008; just check the right-hand column of this page) because I wanted to jump into the conversation.  Those were the heady early Autumn days of Culture11 and Obamaconism, when I still thought I would grow up to be a professional Classicist.  And, through some internet journeys that swept me here, there, and to Upturned Earth in its several locations, that was my reason for staying in the game.

I left for a variety of reasons—among them that I finally managed to tack on enough academic obligations to overwhelm myself.  But more than anything, even before those obligations came due, was that I didn’t know who I was talking to anymore, or what about.

But I’ve had a year to read, to write, to get confused and lose bearings more than once.  I admit, I haven’t read too much of the internet since I left it – I had to go cold turkey for a while, and it was marvelous.  Which leads to the important question: after that much time, what the hell am I doing here of all places.

Well, frankly, it’s because I miss the conversation.  I still harbor my doubts about blogging as the type of writing best suited for me; my concern that it may, in fact, undermine my focus on the kind of writing that, as a form, as a vocation, I truly care about – but as a tool of conversation, I can’t help but think that it’s magnificent.

My concern for politics has continued to atrophy; but my concern for society, for culture, for literature, for knowledge, faith, and art has not.  So we’ll talk.  About those things; about whatever.  So the words will probably just fade noiselessly into the abyss – but don’t they all?  Isn’t the point of it to transform words into – wait for it – something closer to a set of phaidimoi logoi?

So here I am, one more in a long line of Nice Jewish Boys who haven’t realized the trouble they’re getting themselves into with that phrase.

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